10) The vast refereeing conspiracy, which includes black CIA helicopters and some guy on the grassy knoll, is vigorously working against us.

9) The goals used by the Sabres are three inches wider than the rest of the league. More proof that the league hates us.

8) Three words: Barnaby, Barnaby, Barnaby.

7) President Clinton doesn't visit *our* arena.

6) An even broader refereeing conspiracy that also involves former KGB operatives now working on behalf of Peter Bondra.

5) Hasek seems to be preparing for a career as a bullfighter. Ole!

4) The Caps are lucky players who just happen to skate better, pass better, check better and, well, score better.

3) Leg cramps.

2) Hasek forgot to throw the other glove.

And the number one excuse for losing Game 3:

1) We threw the game just to lull you into a false state of overconfidence.